


Stone Still

by princelogical



Series: The Human!Sides College AU Verse [4]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Touch-Starved
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-16
Updated: 2017-09-16
Packaged: 2018-12-30 12:35:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12108852
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/princelogical/pseuds/princelogical
Summary: Why couldn’t Logan have just beennormal?





	Stone Still

**Author's Note:**

> Takes place roughly a month after Logan's wreck.

“I have precisely two hours before they come,” Logan said. He tapped his right hand against his thighs, annoyed that his left arm couldn’t help with the tapping; he looked across his side of the dorm once again. “Patton, be critical please; how does it look?”

Patton looked up from his textbooks and glanced over Logan’s work. “It looks fine, kiddo! Why don’t you take a little nap before they get here? You’re looking kind of tired.”

“Am I?” Logan asked.

“Yes,” Patton said. “But you don’t look bad,” Patton soothed. “Just a little tired. You’ve been cleaning for at least an hour.”

“Perhaps I should get some coffee the-” Patton raised an eyebrow at him. Logan coughed. “Or perhaps not. I should- nap. Yes. Did you know that a fifteen minute power nap can help to restart your system and help you to become more alert, creating a boost in motor skills and cognitive awareness?”

Patton smiled fondly. “No, I didn’t know that. Why don’t you go ahead and take one? You don’t even have to set an alarm; I’ll wake you up.”

“Thank you, Patton.” Logan sat down in his bed and sighed tiredly. “May I confide in you, Patton?”

Patton looked up with a frown. “Of course. What’s up?”

“I am terribly… nervous for my parents’ arrival. We have not spoken since I called about the accident and they were quite angry with me.”

“Angry?” Patton asked frowning. He shut his textbook and sat up, focusing all of his attention on Logan. “Why would they be angry?”

“Why would they not be angry?” Logan asked in confusion. “My insurance bill is nearly unpayable with how high it is at this point.”

“Do they pay for your insurance?”

“No. I do.”

Patton’s frown grew deeper. “Oh. Well, I don’t see why they’d be angry-”

“They said I was being irresponsible and immature. I was throwing my life away.”

Patton looked as if he were thinking deeply; Logan didn’t expect that to look so unsettling. “It was… careless. But… I don’t see why they would be angry. Logan?”

“My parents put a lot of effort into raising me and I have been causing them such a vast amount of disappointment-”

“Woah, woah,” Patton said, putting his palms up. “Don’t do that, kiddo.”

“I am only speaking the truth,” Logan stated. “I did not get into the school my parents wished, I have not accomplished much, and then I nearly killed myself by acting foolishly.”

“Your parents shouldn’t think any less of you,” Patton said.

 _Why not_? Logan thought. However, he just shrugged. “I suppose they do not. Perhaps I’m only projecting my own feelings onto them.”

Patton looked over Logan as if considering something. “I don’t want you to feel that way about yourself,” Patton said quietly. “You’re not a disappointment. You made a mistake; people do that all the time. You just gotta learn from them.”

“I do not like making mistakes,” Logan admitted.

Patton smiled softly. “It’s part of life to make mistakes. It’s okay to make mistakes.”

“Perhaps.”

“Can I give you a hug?” Patton asked.

Logan looked up, eyes widening. His heart thudded in his chest and he felt like someone had rammed something down his throat. “If you wish,” Logan said. Patton stood up and closed the space between them, wrapping his arms around Logan’s tense body.

Logan hated himself; really, there was no other way to put it. He’d been hugged by his mother, maybe twice in his entire life and his father never had ever hugged him. Logan felt like he was choking, felt like the world was crashing around him. Why… why was this such a big deal?

Why couldn’t Logan have just been _normal_?

Logan hated that he wasn’t sure what to do about…it. He hated that he couldn’t relax; he hated that he couldn’t return it properly. He hated that he was likely coming off as a total and complete jerk. He hated that he felt like he was going to do something foolish like whimper.

Patton’s hands gently moved across Logan’s back and one slid up to the back of his neck and gently squeezed then it was over. Logan realized he was shaking. Patton’s face looked too sad for the usually bright and cheerful smile it always held.

“You’re really scared for your parents coming up, huh?” Patton asked; Logan felt like Patton was implying something. Implying _there’s something else here; you can tell me what it is._ Logan wished he could as he kept tapping his fingers even more rapidly against his thigh.

“Yes,” Logan mumbled. “Thank you for listening, Patton.”

“No problem, kiddo. I’m always willing to listen.”

Logan nodded in acknowledgment. “I should probably take a nap now.”

“Yeah,” Patton agreed. “I’ll wake you up in a bit.”

“Okay. Thank you.” Logan slipped off his glasses and necktie and laid into bed closing his eyes tightly, feeling a swirl of _something_ deep in his stomach… his throat… his chest; everywhere. He shoved it down as best as he could. He was feeling too much; he was feeling so much he felt like he was going to explode. He didn’t understand it. He couldn’t.

He bit his trembling lip and desperately willed tears away the entire fifteen minutes of his “nap.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> *Sobbing* I really just wanted to write a self-indulgent hug fic, I'm sorry. 
> 
> Lemme know what you think; comments, critique, your favourite song... it's all appreciated! <3


End file.
